I could lie...but the truth is funnier.

It's such a novice move on my part - turned my back for a second and the roll of paper towels was history. I could lie - tell you that Ella is so smart that I've already trained her to clean up her own messes...but you're not that naive...and if Ella were really that smart, she wouldn't be messing where she ought not be...

Would you believe we were practicing for an upcoming Cottonelle commercial audition? No? hmmpph.